brain on limerence

The Science of Limerence

I have completed my first lesson on TED as one of their educators.

My first offering there is a lesson on limerence and the science behind being in love (and madly so).

It’s interesting to me that we are at a point in the world of science and biology that we can map the brain to determine where “feelings,” or more accurately stated, “drives,” come from within us. 

Researches and scientists use MRI (magnetic resonance imaging) to actually see what part of the human brain is active when someone is in love.

It’s an amazing thing and people can understand more of why they feel what they feel with the help of science.

If you have seen my video on limerence, featured in my TED lesson, you know that having that madly in love crush on someone comes from a lot of dopamine in your system.

Your brain produces this as a reward for putting yourself in a situation where you could reproduce and carry on the human species.

That’s some of the science of it, but you can still find some of the beauty and romance in it by realizing that most of the time, you had admiration and respect for this person after some time with them.

In most situations, limerence happens because of positive traits that you recognize in the other person.

That doesn’t mean that this person is better than everyone on earth, but it does mean that it’s not purely chemical based and that a long term relationship could come from the burning coals of limerence.

Such a long term relationship can come from this infatuation if commitment, companionship, intimacy, and a feeling of family spring up from the fertile soil of limerence.

After limerence fades, and most of it will, those types of love and drives are what can sustain a relationship and help it be more than just the fireworks of newness.

Watch my TED video on the topic to gain a better understanding of how limerence can impact you and your relationships.