A bit of a blast from the past here when Coach Lee was on The Today Show in Australia. Though the interview was serious, I couldn’t help but laugh when the interviewers of Today as they interviewed me on getting and ex back and re-attraction.
Though The Today Show is headquartered in America, you can’t help but notice the cool Australian accents of my interviewers.
Here is the transcript of this interview clip:
Interviewer 1: I want to get specific here Lee, you have found that there is one common mistake that people make when they’re trying to get back with an ex. What is it?
Lee Wilson: It’s desperation. Panic. Because what happens when you do that, you end up begging for mercy because you feel they have the power, right? They have the power, they have the control and you only have the loss. And when you only have the loss and the other person has the power, all you can do is beg for mercy and so that’s the only thing we know to do and so people beg and plead for this person, ‘Love me again, take me back,” and if the other person isn’t motivated, it’s just silliness. It’s not going to be effective and sometimes they might take you back because they feel sorry for you for a day or two but then they resent you more – and then they get mean. When people panic…
Interviewer 2: Yeah and as the power and balance happens in the relationship – so what are your top strategies then? Say someone’s at home watching this now, they miss their ex, they want to reunite with their former partner, let’s start with your top strategies.
Lee Wilson: Okay, well the first thing is going to be, don’t think that you can have ‘a little talk,’ that you can talk them into coming back, because if you can talk them back into it, you really shouldn’t trust it, it’s not going to last and it’s not going to work – but even if it did in the very minority, the least cases, it’s not going to last, but what you actually need to do is the opposite. Instead of blowing up their phone with messages and telling them how much you love them – everybody wants to ‘tell them how you feel’ – well they already know how you feel. You don’t need to tell this person more. What you actually need to do is you need to disappear because you feel the loss right now because they have the control, but if you disappear, you can often create a situation where they feel the loss. They are not hearing from you – I mean they are used to getting your texts, they are used to getting your calls, and that you could just take it like that – that you could just say, ‘Okay,’ and you go live your life and not even try, not chase them, that’s a very attractive position.
Interviewer 2: Play hard to get.
Interviewer 1: Play it cool. He’s smart this guy. Hey you say there’s a time limit on whether or not we should reunite with a partner. What is it, twenty minutes or something?
Lee Wilson: Well for dating relationships, there’s somewhere around the three month mark where the odds just go way down because I do study these things – and the odds go way down. That being said, I do still hear success stories after that amount of time but that’s when you can know the odds are going down and maybe you might want to reach out to them at some point just so you know you tried everything but usually, if it’s going to work, it’s going to work within three months.
Interviewer 2: Alright, Lee, it’s fascinating what you’re doing. For more information you can head to MyExBackCoach.com, there it is on the screen. Lee, good luck to you mate, good to see you.
Interviewer 1: Yeah, thank you for that.
Thank you to The Today Show for having me!