Should my ex think I have moved on?

Should Your Ex Think You Have Moved On?

When contemplating whether your ex thinks you’ve moved on, it’s crucial to consider the potential impacts of this perception.

Many wonder if convincing an ex they’ve moved on is a good strategy, but this tactic can have varied outcomes.

Here, I share my observations and advice based on real-life experiences rather than theoretical concepts or hearsay.

The Double-Edged Sword of Moving On

Convincing your ex that you’ve moved on can play out in different ways.

On the one hand, it might spur your ex to make a bold move to win you back, driven by a fear of losing you for good.

On the other hand, it can lead them to believe that further efforts are futile, as they don’t want to face the pain of rejection. This rejection can be a powerful deterrent, often stifling any attempts to reconnect.

From my coaching sessions, I’ve seen people attempt to show they’ve moved on by posting pictures with new romantic interests or planting clues about their new lives. However, many of these attempts result in prolonged silence from the ex, leaving people wondering what to do next.

The Risks of Trying to Make Your Ex Jealous

Trying to make your ex jealous by showing you’ve moved on can backfire.

The reaction depends on various factors, including your ex’s attachment style.

Avoidant individuals, for instance, are less likely to make an effort if they believe you’ve moved on.

The unpredictability of human emotions means this tactic is risky and often does not yield the desired outcome.

The Power of Mystery

Instead of trying to convince your ex that you’ve moved on, embrace the power of mystery.

When your ex lacks information about your life, they are more likely to seek it out, potentially leading them back to you.

Avoid discussing your breakup or new relationships on social media and with mutual friends.

This strategy keeps your ex intrigued and wondering about you, increasing their curiosity and desire to reconnect.

A Strategy for Moving Forward

A more effective approach is to show your ex that you can move on, not that you have.

This subtle difference starts the clock for your ex, making them realize that your availability is not permanent.

By not initiating contact and living your life independently, you demonstrate strength and resilience, which can reignite their interest and appreciation for you.

Handling Contact from Your Ex

If your ex reaches out, avoid explicitly telling them that you’ve moved on.

Such a statement can lead them to believe that any effort to reconcile is pointless.

Instead, keep the conversation neutral and allow them to perceive your strength through your actions.

Choosing Your Time Frame

Decide on a time frame for yourself to heal and potentially wait for your ex.

Whether it’s two or three months or longer, this period allows you to emotionally recover and approach dating with a clear head.

Rushing into new relationships too soon can be detrimental to your emotional health and future connections.

Final Thoughts

Understanding the nuances of your ex’s perceptions and crafting a thoughtful strategy can significantly impact your chances of reconciliation.

Remember, the key is to show strength and independence, maintaining an air of mystery that keeps your ex intrigued and interested.

For more detailed guidance and strategies tailored to your situation, consider exploring my Emergency Breakup Kit, which provides comprehensive advice on handling interactions with your ex and maximizing your chances of getting back together.


Coach Lee